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Boy With Two Daddies Desperately Needs a Male Role Model

By   41 days ago

gay kid

Seven-year-old Aiden Stevens has a daddy with whom any young boy would be thrilled. Unfortunately, he has another, equally excellent daddy; which means that, essentially, he is completely lacking in the masculine role model department. Lance Carson and Topher Grillo, partners for 12 years, adopted young Aiden in 2007. Since then, Aiden has not wanted for love, guidance, and a strong fashion aesthetic; but relatives and some teachers at his school worry about the effects of being raised in a macho-less home. “Don’t get me [...]

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Minivan Sticker a Painful Reminder of Adopted Boy’s Place in Family

By   43 days ago

car with stickers

For as long as he can remember, Trang Silverberg’s parents have expressed their love and support for the adopted Korean 11-year-old, reassuring him that they will always love him just as much as his siblings. “They always say, ‘we love you just like your normal brother and sister!’ said Trang, in a recent phone interview. “But I’m starting to not believe them.” Trang, the family’s eldest child, was adopted by James and Anne Silverberg after the couple was informed that she was unable to conceieve [...]

Gifted/Talented Students to Get Longer Buses

By   46 days ago

long bus

It’s been three long years in the works, but the parents of the city’s gifted/talented have finally gotten their wish: longer buses for their brilliant children. “It just goes to show you, perseverance pays off – especially when the cause, or need, in this case – is such an obvious one,” said Gail Barton, whose son, Asher, is enrolled in the gifted/talented program at P.S. 75. “The other mothers and fathers got the ball rolling with a huge letter-writing campaign directed at city education officials [...]

Woman Eight Months Pregnant Commits Massive Nip Slip

By   56 days ago

nip slipper

Several Whole Foods shoppers and employees got an eyeful of areola Saturday afternoon thanks to Diane McCann’s gargantuan nip-slip. McCann, who is eight months pregnant, first (inadvertantly) introduced Whole Foods deli manager Darren Osten to her rogue nipple after bending over to retrieve the shopping list she had dropped in front of his deli case. “Even seeing the nip-slip through the distorted deli glass, I knew this thing was special,” said Osten. “I called one of my guys over to have a look – so [...]

Nannycams Still Catching “The Help” Ripping Us Off Blind

By   60 days ago

cookie thief

Do you ever wonder what kind of riffraff the woman you’ve entrusted with your defenseless, innocent babies is (or isn’t), doing while your slaving away at your job? Well, the answer might surprise you. Unless you have a nannycam; in which case the answer will probably not surprise you since you wouldn’t be spying on her in the first place if you weren’t suspicious. Consider the actions of one Lucilla Mazone. For three years, the warm, 26-year-old Mexican nanny dutifully and lovingly tended to three-year-old [...] Launches New Site For Loudmouth Mommies to Swap Insults and Judge One Another While Droning on Endlessly About Their Stupid and Unoriginal Opinions About Everything.

By   65 days ago

site founders, who wisely predicted that women permanently banned from such websites as or for bad behavior would kill for the opportunity to get back in the game, has finally gone live. “We’re fully aware that some view us as urbanbaby and’s sloppy seconds,” said founder Karla Dworin. “But believe me, if you saw some of the originality, effort, and literary acrobatics that go into these women’s unprompted insults and character eviscerations, you’d realize these bitches are anything but sloppy. Caitlin [...]

Placenta: What Is It? Will We Ever Understand its Real Purpose?

By   117 days ago

placenta main graphic

“Mr. Clunie, what would you like us to do with the placenta?” “What would I like you to do with the placenta? I don’t know, how about you throw it away?” I hadn’t prepared myself for nurse Weirdo’s reaction, or the doozie which followed: “Have you and your wife not made plans for her placenta?” Long pause …complete with the world’s first visible, hovering question mark (over my head). “OK then,” she said. “Let’s keep the placenta refrigerated until you’ve given this the attention it deserves.” [...]

Unskilled Face-painter Gives Up On Executing “The Perfect Batman” in Lieu of “The Much Easier Blackface.”

By   130 days ago

lil blackface

A Montessori School volunteer’s good intentions were undermined by his glaring lack of artistic ability this weekend as several children were seen exiting his face-painting station sporting inky, unmistakable blackface. David Kolwurst, who had happily volunteered for face-painting duty, readily admitted that his frustration at pulling off the well-known (and not particularly difficult), Batman mask got the best of him. “You know what? Batman is actually not as easy to paint as people think. Especially when the kid is squirming and sweating and whatnot. At [...]