Is Purell Killing You And Your Family?
THE ANSWER JUST MIGHT SURPRISE YOU. When was the last time you didn’t see a Purell dispenser? Can’t think of one? Well, that’s because for every thirty square feet of America, there are six Purell dispensers. But what, exactly, is Purell? And is it killing those who use it? Short answer? No, of course it isn’t killing [...]
Read More →Boy With Two Daddies Desperately Needs a Male Role Model
Seven-year-old Aiden Stevens has a daddy with whom any young boy would be thrilled. Unfortunately, he has another, equally excellent daddy; which means that, essentially, he is completely lacking in the masculine role model department. Lance Carson and Topher Grillo, partners for 12 years, adopted young Aiden in 2007. Since then, Aiden has not wanted [...]
Read More →Minivan Sticker a Painful Reminder of Adopted Boy’s Place in Family
For as long as he can remember, Trang Silverberg’s parents have expressed their love and support for the adopted Korean 11-year-old, reassuring him that they will always love him just as much as his siblings. “They always say, ‘we love you just like your normal brother and sister!’ said Trang, in a recent phone interview. [...]
Read More →Gifted/Talented Students to Get Longer Buses
It’s been three long years in the works, but the parents of the city’s gifted/talented have finally gotten their wish: longer buses for their brilliant children. “It just goes to show you, perseverance pays off – especially when the cause, or need, in this case – is such an obvious one,” said Gail Barton, whose [...]
Read More →Woman Eight Months Pregnant Commits Massive Nip Slip
Several Whole Foods shoppers and employees got an eyeful of areola Saturday afternoon thanks to Diane McCann’s gargantuan nip-slip. McCann, who is eight months pregnant, first (inadvertantly) introduced Whole Foods deli manager Darren Osten to her rogue nipple after bending over to retrieve the shopping list she had dropped in front of his deli case. [...]
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NINETY-NINE PERCENT of those cute animated films kids enjoy watching again and again carry the same disturbing message. AND IT DOESN’T EXACTLY MAKE US HUMANS LOOK GREAT. Let’s think back to the Disney classic, Bambi. After little toothpick legs is born, there are essentially three life-changing (and life-ending) events: MAN setting fire to the woods, Bambi’s [...]
Read More →Nannycams Still Catching “The Help” Ripping Us Off Blind
Do you ever wonder what kind of riffraff the woman you’ve entrusted with your defenseless, innocent babies is (or isn’t), doing while your slaving away at your job? Well, the answer might surprise you. Unless you have a nannycam; in which case the answer will probably not surprise you since you wouldn’t be spying on [...]
Read More →Judgemental-Dbag-Mommy-Chat.com Launches New Site For Loudmouth Mommies to Swap Insults and Judge One Another While Droning on Endlessly About Their Stupid and Unoriginal Opinions About Everything.
Judgemental-Dbag-Mommy-Chat.com, who wisely predicted that women permanently banned from such websites as youbemom.com or urbanbaby.com for bad behavior would kill for the opportunity to get back in the game, has finally gone live. “We’re fully aware that some view us as urbanbaby and youbemom.com’s sloppy seconds,” said JDMC.com founder Karla Dworin. “But believe me, if [...]
Read More →Placenta: What Is It? Will We Ever Understand its Real Purpose?
“Mr. Clunie, what would you like us to do with the placenta?” “What would I like you to do with the placenta? I don’t know, how about you throw it away?” I hadn’t prepared myself for nurse Weirdo’s reaction, or the doozie which followed: “Have you and your wife not made plans for her placenta?” Long [...]
Read More →Unskilled Face-painter Gives Up On Executing “The Perfect Batman” in Lieu of “The Much Easier Blackface.”
A Montessori School volunteer’s good intentions were undermined by his glaring lack of artistic ability this weekend as several children were seen exiting his face-painting station sporting inky, unmistakable blackface. David Kolwurst, who had happily volunteered for face-painting duty, readily admitted that his frustration at pulling off the well-known (and not particularly difficult), Batman mask [...]
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New Little Laura Louse Doll Grows REAL Head Lice, Has World’s Tiniest Comb
April 17, 2013
They say the best ideas strike when you least expect. Just ask Jaclyn Nettles, the Brooklyn mother who, while watching her twin daughters playfully comb the dead lice carcasses out of each others freshly-deloused hair, came upon her idea for a lice-hosting doll. The doll, dubbed Little Laura Louse, grows real head lice (yes, REAL head lice!
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