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Crib’s Battery-Drained Music Box Sounds Like Every Horror Film Ever Made

freaked out baby

By   /   February 26, 2013  /   No Comments

If you’ve seen even one horror movie in your lifetime, you are no doubt familiar with the genre’s penchant for tweaking and warping a well-known children’s song – by way of slowing down or otherwise altering its speed. This technique has become a scary movie staple by playing right into a visceral reaction we have upon hearing innocent, yet obscenely-altered music.

Successful as this may be for a horror movie’s cumulative creep-out quotient, it fails miserably in a one-year-old’s darkened, already-scary bedroom. Just ask Staten Island sixteen-month-old BranDee Axle, whose crib music box has been belching an unsettling soundtrack for thirteen days, due to her dad’s unwillingness to replace what he says are “still perfectly good” batteries.

“I’m not tossing fifteen bucks worth of batteries until that music comes to a dead stop,” said BranDee’s dad, David Axle.

“Yeah it sounds creepy. Big deal. When I was a kid I didn’t have lullabys to put me to sleep. Or night-lights. Or cute wallpaper or dangling teddybear mobiles and whatnot. You know what I had dangling over my crib? Flypaper. Worked like a damn charm too.”

BranDee’s mother Carla, on the other hand, is doing her best to wear out the batteries in hopes of expediting their replacement.

“I play her music as often as possible, regardless of whether BranDee is in her room or not,” said Carla. “I’m doing my best to drain those batteries, but they will not give out. I wish batteries either worked, or didn’t work. This in-between, warbly-sounding phase just stinks. We bought this music box to help BranDee sleep, not terrorize the poor thing. I’m afraid she’s becoming a jumpy, very easily irked baby.”

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